Acting after due Consideration
Nandraatra Lullun Thavuruntu Avaravar / Panparin Thaatraak Katai
Classical English couplet — “Though well the work be done, yet one mistake is made,To habitudes of various men when no regard is paid”
What it says in plain words
“Even trying to help can go wrong if you do not understand someone. Learn what each person is like, and help in ways that suit them.”
The classical Tamil reading
அவரவருடைய இயல்புகளை அறிந்து அவரவருக்குப் பொருந்துமாறு செய்யாவிட்டால், நன்மை செய்வதிலும் தவறு உண்டாகும்.
An expanded Tamil interpretation
ஒருவருடைய இயல்பைப் புரிந்து கொண்டுதான் நன்மையைக் கூடச் செய்ய வேண்டும் இல்லாவிட்டால் அதுவே தீமையாகத் திருப்பித் தாக்கும்
The ethical and philosophical heart
People differ in how they think, feel, and accept help. What comforts one person may make another feel embarrassed. Good intentions alone do not keep help from causing harm. Take time to understand the person before helping. Then choose an approach that fits them, rather than treating everyone alike.
In personal life, work and society
- Personal
- Before helping a friend, ask whether they want advice or quiet company.
- Workplace
- Thank a coworker privately if public praise makes them uncomfortable.
- Family
- Give a child time to think if immediate questions make them withdraw.
- Society
- Ask residents how they prefer to receive help before arranging community support.
How to apply this today
- Decision-making
- Consider how each person might respond before choosing how to help.
- Integrity
- Do not assume your good intentions make every action helpful.
- Communication
- Ask what feels helpful instead of guessing what someone wants.
- Leadership
- Adjust your support to each person's way of learning and working.
- Governance
- Learn how different groups live before designing services meant to help them.
For leaders and teams
When guiding others, fit your support to the person. The same advice or praise may affect each person differently.
Something to sit with
“Who could you understand better today before trying to help them?”